A few days ago Whitney Houston died in a bath, in a hotel room, probably due to a drugs overdose or binge drinking or both. What followed was a global Tsunami of grief and emotional outpouring from fans and the general public who had never met her, or were ever likely to meet her. There were photo-shopped Whitney headstones on facebook, endless You Tube recommendations and enough hearts and X’s to choke any Barbara Cartland devotee.
It made me wonder why it is that some people choose to heap all their sadness and grief upon celebrities such as Ms Houston when there’s so much more death and depravity to choose from? Do singers have the monopoly on collective bereavement? Perhaps it was the ‘Marilyn’ Factor' that set off a chain reaction? Who knows? I also think the majority prefers to follow the crowd, regardless of whether it’s the right thing to do. No one wants to be viewed as a callous, uncaring person who’s not that bothered about the death of someone who was famous 20 years ago. To do that risks being labelled as unpopular and one of the ‘out crowd’.
It takes courage and a lot of gumption to buck the trend. Politicians must dread Q& A sessions if they spot someone in the audience who they know will ask the one question they don’t want to hear and cannot possibly answer. Certain people though, like Sheep, are simply waiting to be herded. It doesn’t matter if the herder is a wolf or a shepherd; it’s all the same to them. They just need to be given the order to run down a hill as quickly as possible with the minimum amount of fuss.
There’s also a scary minority who try and out-grieve one another. These are individuals who are just waiting for the right celebrity to pop their clogs, so they can unleash their arsenal of sadness on the world, and sink their teeth into a great big juicy death. They write eulogies, post pictures and organise groups solely devoted to ‘letting it all out’. They score each other’s efforts with smileys, hearts and X’s. Thankfully, these 'compassionate fiends' only have a relatively short window of opportunity, so they need to maximise their efforts before the grief-wave recedes and everyone goes back to doing what they do best – bitching and moaning about nothing of any real significance.
If a loved and cherished family member or close friend passes away we don't shout about it on twitter or facebook (well I don't anyway!) Most of us conduct our grief privately, in separate rooms, and in some cases separate houses. Sometimes we consider sharing our grief if we are among people who have also lost someone close to them. At other times we feel the need to unburden ourselves to perfect strangers.
After all, grief is a process to be endured not a band-wagon to be ridden.
Very well said. Love your phrase 'pop their clogs' That's a new one for me.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I did like a few of Whitney's songs, I don't feel any overwhelming grief over her death. I don't think if I were the one who had died, and Whitney were alive, that Whitney would mourn my death. I think for some, they mourn the loss of her talent and the idea she won't be able to sing another ballad again. But some take it to extremes and really, it's annoying.
I think it's interesting that Kevin Costner appears to have played a significant part in the celebrity mourning. This is a man who starred with her in a movie many many years ago and yet has been thrust forward as a figure head for the grief stricken millions. There he is, like a knight in shining armour again, only he couldn't save her this time.
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